We Now have an ADULT marriage (18 years old)



My husband thought that would be a funny post title...and I agreed...it made me laugh...I kinda feel like we've done a lot a growing over 18 years :)

I don't cherish our "story" because it's anything special or remarkable, or beyond belief...

I love our story because it's OURS.

Let's face it, we're all just trying to do our best, to be our best selves...but in reality, we all are a "mess"...we all are selfish and so often convince ourselves that we are worthy of perfection, even to the detriment of those that we love...

That's why LOVE isn't a feeling, but it's a choice...it's a choice you make everyday...when the little idiosyncrasies drive you nuts, when you maybe feel like this wasn't what you were envisioning, when life changes you in ways you never thought...

That's why LOVE is a choice...

I know that people do change over time...and, I'm pretty sure that I don't want to be that 20 something year old again...(perhaps maybe have that body back, but that's whole nother topic...) Life experiences change you...you move with the ebb and flow...

A and I have slowly and even methodically changed over our 18 years of married life...I like to think of it as a "seasoning" of sorts. We've had to learn how to shift to accommodate and sometimes confront and show humility...we've also cheered one another on to achieve things we never thought possible before...

I know that my "mess" may have been busting at the seams when he first met me...and perhaps that's why I leaned into that security and love that he gave...because, he could have chosen differently...he could have made an easier choice, a more FUN one than being willing to take on the likes of me :)

However, "mess" just happens too...we entered married life not knowing what this whole "9-5 job" thing really looked like living together...and then came kids...and actual parenting of little lives that depended 100% on us...and we learned how to rely on each other, and work as a team in a different way...and then other things start changing...like jobs, homes, bodies, relationships, churches, cars, finances...I've watched my sweet husband put the weight of the responsibility of protector, provider & leader on his shoulders as he cared for our family of 5...and together, we push against our own "wants" to try to give to one another...sometimes we do great and sometimes we fail miserably...BUT, we have chosen to navigate those waters together.

We still have so much more to learn...together...in the choosing day in and day out...a little seasoning here and seasoning there...I am thankful for the commitment to keep choosing...for the hopeful future of grey hair & front porch rocking chairs...for this man that continues to choose me, who I continue to choose...

And I still love our story...even in the seasoning...because it's ours!

You can read it HERE :) 

Happy Anniversary Love :)


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